Blower Vacs that Suck

To whom it may concern at stupid leaf blower manufacturing companies:

You guys should closely watch Back to the Future II. I was watching it the other night and I had an epiphany: hover boards don't make noise.

Try using that technology.

I talked to a young man named Dignan (last name withheld) that worked for a gardening outfit called The Lawn Rangers.

"Yeah, I'd like to see silent leaf blowers. What would I do if I didn't see one? Well, that poses an interesting question," said Dignan, firmly entrenching my vehemence:

If you don't start making silent leaf blowers, I'm going to find out where you live and put hundreds of REALLY HEAVY STEEL LEAVES on your front lawns. Then you'll have to bend over and pick them up.

You don't want that, do you?

your enemy,

Brandon N. Huigens

[ Noise Sucks ] <- Theres more gold located here